Disappointed.

This is gonna be a long post..
okay, so Compassvale Military Band had our SYF yesterday, 2nd April 2009.
i was confident that CVMB will sure clinch the GWH because we were so UP TO OUR STANDARDS. seriously, okay not OURS BUT MR ER'S.
morning went well, except that halfway while er's conducting, he sprained his neck.
or shoulder, and got injured. at first i thought nothing of it.
but as i think through, i figured that it must be a bad omen..

okay then after that we set off to Singapore Conference Hall.
we were so excited yet nervous.
mr er was telling us not to be nervous and enjoy the music.
we went in, eyes on us.
settled down, and began to play.
i made some mistakes, but it wasnt obvious
at part L, my saliva got stucked at the bocal
and it kept, "tock tock tock" and i lost my confidence and played softer
following on was okay..
cavetown too.. until at one part i was supposed to play Aflat i go play Bflat...

went back school.
everybody was excited about the results.
Compassvale performed well, we did not disappoint Mr Er.
then, esther on-ed loudspeaker and we waited for the results.
when the announcer announced:
Compassvale - Silver.
it was exactly the same tone and pitch like it was TWO YEARS ago.
when we got our FIRST SILVER.
the impact was huge.
waves of emotions rushed through, i thought about what Mrs Lek said TWO YEARS ago.
she said, crying is of no use. get back the gold and do Mr Er proud (smth like that )

then i decided not to cry.
i went back to my seat.
Joash alr started sniffing, then came Alexia, sniffing.
and more and more people started to cry.
i couldnt take it anymore and i let my tears flow.
i thought about the huge disappointment in everybody and most importantly,
Mr Er.

We were so confident of clinching that GOLD medal that we aimed for GWH.
in the end, we got SILVER. it was a second SILVER ALREADY.
everyone worked so damn bloody hard to get that GOLD.
AND I THINK THAT WE HAVE PLAYED WELL, ESP OVERTURE 2.
it was not like TWO YEARS ago, when there were breakdowns and such.
there WAS this year, but minor breakdowns. therefore, i dont think that its so serious,
until they can give us silver.

Im annoyed, im anguished
im UPSET im FEELING MISERABLE.
words of sadness and disappointment best suits me.
sort of cried my heart out. and after that i walked home
on the way of leaving the school, saw Yingshu, Enqi & Eunice.
thanks YS and EQ for the hugs, appreciated.
thanks to 3 of them for consoling me.
seriously when i saw Yingshu, she approached me with a hug
and i just cry. cry cry cry.
after that, bidded goodbye and i walked home.
my face was pulled into a long face..

reached home, i was in such a lousy mood till i dont bother to talk
after that, i played with my hamsters and i wento sleep
woke up have dinner watch tv and i wento sleep again
woke up this morn ard 6.30am

was uber tired and my eyes were puffy.
didnt wanto go to school, but jianying asked me to go.
so i went, in the end i was late.
then after that had lessons and so on
seeing my fellow peers feeling moody and down,
my heart weighed. theres nothing anybody can do

CVMB! WE HAVE TO MOVE ON SERIOUSLY.
TO ALL MY SEC4S AND SEC5S BAND MATES,
PLEASE, GET OVER IT. MOVE ON. WE HAVE OUR MAJOR EXAMS TO BE MORE CONCENTRATED ON!!!!

to our juniors,
PLEASE, WORK HARD AND STRIVE HARD IN BAND
I KNOW IT WILL BE TOUGH WITHOUT SENIORS IN BAND
BUT YOU HAVE TO LEARN TO ADAPT
NOTHINGS IMPOSSIBLE!
MR ER WILL COME BACK
HE WILL STILL TEACH US.

okay, i suddenly missed Mr Er so much. ))))):
i feel like apologising to him
he wanted GOLD so much, he had suffered enough.
i wanted back the GOLD too, i wanted to bring back the GLORY for our band
but sadly, we FAILED.
we failed in our mission.
thats that. we cant do anything about it
we cant change th results.
but im quite looking forward about the comments
and see what IS THE REASON THEY GAVE US A FUCKING SILVER.

OKAY, CVMB! WE'RE STILL A GOLD BAND
in every band student's & mr er's heart
we are the best and we always will be!


-
i skipped chi asp and went home
cos i was really MOODLESSSSSS.
i want to go out SO BADLY.
no one was free, but im going out with HARU tmr
like finally. ahhhh
felt better after hours & hours of online shopping (:
my eyes hurt now. argh

I LOVE COMPASSVALE MILITARY BAND!
ALTHOUGH I DONT HAVE MUCH FRIENDS THERE. (:
WHAT MR ER SAID ABOUT ME IS SO TRUE.
I LOVE HIM SO MUCH! xoxo